two live sets from suspiciously hot and sticky summer in richmond
velmuh debut performances
thank u brandon sam and will for recordings

hall of the bulls historical treatise vol. 2 transcript for those who would like to follow along:
6 August 2019 A.D.

Good evening.
During this presentation, I will be sharing my opinions on a story/historical event/ parable-type situation which has been pulling on my so-called heartstrings as of lately.
As a disclaimer, I truly can not guarantee the accuracy or existence of this story whatsoever, as I have just been researching it in my off time, and most of the Data presented here tonight will be pulled from second-hand retellings and other outdated information.
At one point in this presentation I will ask that you attempt to transport yourself mentally back to the year 1995. For some of you in the audience who appear not to have entered your maternal incubation period as of that time, you may need to employ a bit more imaginative effort in this task, but please attempt to do so regardless of the state of your mortal existence (or lack thereof) on this earth during the relevant timeframe.
I am going to start the history at the end, as I fear my ability to logically circle back to my final conclusion from the beginning may be inadequate, and for now there is no reliable way to predict my success.
You may recall from Smithsonian magazine or various entry-level art history classes at your local university a certain cave complex in southern France containing the famous "Hall of the Bulls." Within these caves there is a wall with empty outlines of a hundred hands overlapping each other, and also a hall with many bulls and other important animals of prehistoric times. Please disregard the fact that prehistoric may not be the most accurate label for this period, as we are currently discussing the history of the time and events that unfolded, making it therefore clearly historic in nature. However, this is how humans have deemed appropriate to label this period of time, and so I will maintain this naming custom for the sake of my primarily human audience tonight.
These cave paintings are known as the oldest cave paintings ever to have been discovered. They are made up mostly of paint from rust oxide, crushed pollen, and rendered animal fat. These materials made up some of the first red, brown, and yellow "paints" as we currently understand them.
We have the hall of the bulls, which is accessible only through a very small hole in the ground, which then leads you on to the main cavern. There is a picture of an injured man who as been speared by the horns of the bull. Apparently this is a very famous cave complex, although I had never come across it in my research until this time last week while I was preparing for this presentation.
We will now be moving on from the cave paintings, but keep them in the back of your mind as we will be returning to this topic later on.
Now is when I will politely ask you to imagine the year 1995 as you understand it. That winter some of you may have been babies trapped indoors and running out of baby formula and disposable diapers during a large blizzard. Some of you may have been fully fledged adults or young children going about typical human life. Some of you may have been wrapped safely in the womb, and some of you may not yet have been able to conceptualize the notion of existing, as you did not yet exist whatsoever, so to speak.
So moving forward we will do the best we can to put ourselves in this mindspace, barring our own personal bodily circumstances at the time.
This year, America On Line (retroactively known as aol.com) went live for the first time. People around the country were downloading Windows 95 from floppy discs onto their large personal computers. All around it was a very bizarre situation for both humans and computers alike.
This year, the cave system containing the hall of the bulls and the aforementioned other paintings was rediscovered. Its initial discovery was in 1952, and it was “re-discovered” yet again in the late 1970s. I have yet to discern why its rediscovery, not its first but its second rediscovery, was a historical event of note in the 1995 "Significant Historical Events "page of Wikipedia, but we must continue on.
The most important historical aspect of this story in my opinion is that 1995 was the same year the original 1952 explorer of the cave complex died of old age in his bed in southern France. I find it baffling that this significant aspect of the story was not noted more enthusiastically in all of the historical databases with whom I consulted during my research, nor brought up through any other artificial intelligence or machine learning systems who had been residing in the database at that time. The caves which played such a noted impact in his life were rediscovered in the same year of his death.
This brings us to the conclusion of our story, which is also the beginning. Why did Marcel first discover these caves in 1942 in the first place? A small hole tucked away in a mountain side seems an unlikely place for adventuring, especially in wartime. Accounts state that the whole reason he ended up in this cave in the first place was because he was out for a hike with his dog, who then fell down the hole. During his rescue mission, Marcel noted that the cavern seemed to go on for quite a ways, and after he and his dog were safe from harm back on the surface, he recruited three of his best friends to come back with him on an exploration mission. He hypothesized that it may have been the rumored secret entrance to a very rich and powerful man’s mansion who lived on the hill, and the boys planned to go through the secret mountain entrance to explore the elderly man’s estate.
To their disappointment, when they returned and went deeper into the cave, all they found was the hall of the bulls and some hands painted on the wall.
But there is one piece of information missing which elucidates the strange vascular system which connects Marcel, the hall of the bulls, 1942, America Online dot com, 1995, and the persistent loss and rediscovery of information regarding the cave.
The lost dog’s name was Robot. This is a fact that truly warms my heart, so to speak. I only wish it had been brought to my attention at the time so that I could have witnessed it firsthand.

Thanks for coming to my "TED talk."